Christmas Eve’s Eve

Last night was … eventful.

Tom and I rented G-Force and Public Enemy. He wrapped presents while I made Isabella a blanket (lack of money has forced us to be creative this year). Then Sheena and I went to see Avatar. The movie was great; my tummy after popcorn, soda and chocolate was not so great.
I picked the Isabella up from my mom’s (where she apparently cried all night) and as soon and she was in the car seat she fell asleep. Tom and I watched ghost TV shows until 11 and I decided I wanted to wake the baby to feed her before I went to bed. She was so tired she would just suck on the bottle and pass back out. Finally after wresting with her to eat, I decided she was too tied to (wish I had decided that earlier). So I sat her up and tried to wake her up, but she must have still had formula in her mouth and I startled her. Well she started choking. Not the cough cough, shallow breathing choking. I mean not breathing lips turning blue choking. I had my hand on my phone to call 911 while Tom was all but beating her when I finally heard her let out a scream. I’ll tell you, that cry was 100% better than the first one I heard from her at the hospital. The only thing I was thinking was;

…hospital… 20 minutes away… volunteer fire department… 5 minutes away… they’re idiots… where’s the closest ambulance… maybe I should flip her upside down…

I felt like the world’s worst mother after and pretty much woke up to every peep all night. I knew I should have woken her up more before I shoved a bottle in her mouth. But she’s thankfully fine, smiling as big as ever this morning.
Today was lazy. I finished the blanket (pictures to come) and played with Isabella while Tom wrapped presents. Now I have to tackle a sink full of dishes because Tom generously cleaned the ENTIRE house while I was at the movies last night
(except the dishes, of course).

Dear Public

Dear Guy in the track suit,
I would have gladly held the door for you if you had not cut in front of my husband who was pushing my three month old baby, totally checking the cart she was in on your way out. Because you assumed I was doing you a courtesy and decided to show us none, I had to let go of the door in your face. Thanks for flipping me off on your way out though. Merry Christmas to you too.

Dear HEAP office,
The $40 you offered us to pay our utility bill while we have no income wouldn’t really be worth the twenty minutes it takes me to drive to your office every month. And no, sorry I can’t quiet my daughter down, SHE’S PROBABLY COLD.

Dear Mall Santa,
Please don’t hack up a lung while holding my baby. I guess this is partly my fault. Tom and I debated on whether or not to bring her to see you because of the germs. But your obvious sickness really made us regret our decision. Just a piece of advice, next time bring a tissue and cover your mouth.

Oh and after all the trying to cheer Tom up, I go to the mall with my mom and Lil’ Sis and instantly get depressed. I have to constantly tell them Tom and I don’t need anything and helplessly watch as my sixteen year old sister purchases things for my daughter that I can no longer afford. I was pretty much a Sad Sally when I got back home to Tom and Isabella. Tom did the cheering up this time by making me dinner, pouring me a drink, putting in a Christmas movie, and helping me wrap the measly amount of presents we actually have for people. He also danced me and my daughter around anytime a recognizable song came on the movie.
He really surprises me sometimes.

Finding a JOB

So today was somewhat productive. Since Tom lost his job I’ve been looking for one. I obviously feel pretty guilty saying I’m a stay at home mom with no income what so ever. So we went out searching. Just parttime work because 1) child care is SO expensive 2) we’re kind of banking on Tom finding another job pretty quickly. I’ve been wanting to go back to work anyway. Staying at home feels like more work than an actual job sometimes. Not that I don’t love spending time with my daughter, I’d just like some adult interaction.
Also, Tom took the ASVAB two days ago and heard back from his recruiter today. I guess his score greatly improved since his practice test (which was good in the first place) and the recruiter said he opened up a lot of doors for himself. (If only he could make up his mind.) So we’re moving forward with that. I just have to get some paper work in order, as in, find my daughter’s birth certificate. OOPS.
I’m also trying to figure out what we’re doing for Christmas. I’m on the verge of saying HEY! Lets rent a huge place out so my huge Italian side of the family, my petite Dutch side, and all of Tom’s family can eat at once. Because quite frankly I’m not looking forward to driving half an hour to my moms, then half an hour to his moms, then BACK the other way to my grandpas, just to end up BACK towards his moms (where we live close by). Did ya follow that? It’s a waste of a day if you ask me. Ah well, apparently Tom’s mom may not even be able to get off of work for Christmas.
Speaking of Christmas’, Tom was a super Grinch today. He feels awful for losing his job right before the holidays and like Isabella will resent him because of her lack of presents (she’s 3 months, I’m going to guess she doesn’t remember). I’ve been trying to cheer him up with decorating and telling him of all the fun traditions we do at my grandpas that DOESN’T revolve around presents. But I don’t think he’s buying it. Oh well. In 10 days it will all be over and no one will care anymore.
I'm still looking forward to the holidays. I think this is the first actual Christmas that I don't care about what I'm getting. When my mom asked me what I wanted I told her dish towels and glasses, because ours mysteriously break.
I'm more looking forward to seeing family that I haven't seen since last year...
...and showing my beautiful daughter off.

For Starters

First post! I’ve attempted blogs in the past. But due to my previously uninteresting life I have yet to maintain one (not saying my life is particularly interesting at this point in time, just figured I’d give it another go).

I am a twenty year old mom and wife. My husband, Tom, and I met through my cousin in 2007. We were engaged on Thanksgiving 2008, married on Memorial Day 2009, and had a beautiful baby girl, Isabella, on Labor Day. I guess we like holidays. I think of myself as a perpetual learner. I have an associate’s degree in adolescent education, but I honestly couldn’t tell you what I want to do with my life besides go to school. I never minded the papers and the reading and I love everything from science to history to English (just can’t handle math).

My husband seems to be as indecisive as I am. He is currently working on getting into the Navy, but when we try to discuss some jobs he might enjoy, he seems to have a million things in his head. His father joined the Air Force in his late twenties and since Tom turned 28 he feels as though 1) his time is running out and 2) it’s his duty (with a little “encouragement” from his dad I’m suspecting). Since he recently he lost his job due to downsizing he has pretty much made up his mind about the military. Just as I was adjusting to being a 20 year old stay at home mom and wife, I may have to learn the play a totally new role as well.

SO! Mainly with this blog I want to
- document my daughters milestones
- keep track of my husband’s progress
- vent my frustrations with day to day life
- probably the occasional recipe and
- review two books a month (I only add this because I feel if it’s a public goal I’ll be more willing to follow through with it… I need to read more).